The biggest problem when trying to catch a woman’s attention via email is that she probably gets lots of messages from different men every day. While there are only 40% women on dating websites, there are about 60% men. On top of that, men are much more aggressive and willing to contact the ladies first, so it is no wonder there is so much competition for their attention.
If you want to increase your chances of successfully getting replies from women on the Internet, you must stand out from the crowd. Here are a few tips you can follow to ensure a response.
Use proper grammar. While some women may not mind at all, bad grammar is a turn-off for lots of women on the Internet. You should make sure to use proper grammar and full sentences when communicating online.
Avoid using chat room abbreviations like “How r u?” Use the full sentence and correct grammar instead: “How are you?” You may also want to avoid emoticons. Not all women are used to emoticons or chat room abbreviations. It just might leave a bad first impression. Let’s keep luck on your side. Wait until you get to know her better before getting too casual.
One trick is to use Microsoft Word’s spell-check to correct your messages. Just copy and paste your message into a Word document, run the spell-check on it, then copy and paste it back into your web browser field. I definitely recommend doing this before sending your messages to ensure better grammar.
Keep it short. Keep your first few messages short, about 10 to 20 sentences. If a message is too long, she might not read the whole thing. You do not want to spend an hour writing a message to a woman without knowing if she will be interested in contacting you or not. You will end up wasting hours of work, getting frustrated, and maybe even giving up on it.
If a message is too short, however, she might just skip it and go to the next one. You must find a good balance and make sure to include something that will catch her attention.
Show that you have read her profile. This might catch her attention. Find something that you like, that you have in common, or that you are curious about, and briefly talk about it in your first email.
For example, I once saw a profile of a woman who enjoyed kickboxing. Since it is a bit unusual for women to take part in a combat sport, I was curious and sent her a very short email. I briefly introduced myself in two or three sentences, and at the end of the email, I wrote: “Are you really doing kickboxing?”
I got a reply from her the same day. That’s how we began communicating. I then tried that “Are you really doing” type of sentence in my other emails, and it was surprisingly effective.
The bottom line is to make sure to include something about her profile that really did catch your attention. Do not just copy and paste the same message again and again. That method is not the most effective. Go for quality instead of quantity.
Avoid talking about sex. When you first begin to exchange emails with a woman, avoid talking about sex too soon. That’s surely not the best card to play. You will simply be wasting your time. Make sure to get to know her and let her get to know you before you become too intimate.
Don’t give up. Remember that women may be swamped with tons of messages from admirers who want to know more about them and are willing to date them, even more so if they have cute photos on their profiles. At any given moment, you can be sure that a woman’s mailbox is filled with messages. So if she does not reply to you, don’t blame it all on yourself or on your writing skills. Keep at it, and I guarantee you that the effort will ultimately pay off.
Be honest. Being honest is one of the most important factors when communicating with women online. You do not at any time want to have to justify a lie or false information that you have given her. Be honest, and make sure she likes the real you. In the end you will feel much better about yourself, and you will also avoid some uncomfortable situations that might just turn her off. After all, no one likes to deal with a liar.
Be creative and specific: Avoid writing things like: “My name is Bob. I am 30 years old. I like to watch movies, eat out, and walk on the beach.” That’s sound so boring! It does not say anything about you, and she has probably received tons of emails that sound just like this.
Try to stand out from the crowd by writing about something you found in her profile that she has in common with you or that you are curious about, and write something she can agree with. Be creative and specific, and if you can, add some humor.
In the end, I think the one thing you need to remember is that women are often overwhelmed with dozen of messages from different admirers who want to go on dates with them. When writing your messages, if you put in the effort to stand above the rest, your chances of success will increase greatly. Most men write boring and very general messages when first emailing women. They did not do what you are doing right now: learn how to write proper messages that will catch her attention and make her respond. Just using these tips will certainly help.